While Deployed, Veteran Reviews Wife’s Bank Transactions and Grows Suspicious of Infidelity

When trust in a marriage is broken, especially under the pressure of military deployment, the foundations of family life are often irreparably damaged. The story follows a veteran deployed overseas who discovers anomalous transactions during routine checks of his financial accounts, setting off a chain of discoveries, each more disturbing than the last. His attempt to reconcile these discoveries with the reality of his wife’s actions at home opens Pandora’s box of betrayal and deceit, challenging the sanctity of their marriage and raising serious concerns for the well-being of their children.

As this veteran navigates the troubling waters of suspicion and eventual confirmation of infidelity, we’re treated to a stark look at the emotional turmoil such situations create. The narrative is not only about betrayal or the steps leading to the discovery of the truth; it’s a poignant reminder of the quiet battles fought by the families of those who serve. It highlights the unique pressures on military families and the devastating impact of infidelity on those relationships.

When the man was deployed in Afghanistan, he often checked his accounts online to make sure the automatic payment option was working properly. One day he opened his credit card account and went through the transaction history and found something unusual.

The man admitted that his attention was caught by the unusual transaction, so he quickly thought about the reasons that could have made his wife spend the money.

Unable to think of a good reason, he casually mentioned the transaction while talking to his wife on Skype and saw the change in her expression.

A Redditor with the username Aggravating-Ad-5793 opened the transaction years after discovering it. Going through the transaction history, he also noticed a few extra dinners.

Since his wife was alone with the children, he thought that a few extra dinners were not alarming to him. He knew how hard it must be for his wife to handle the children alone. However, one particular transaction rang alarm bells for him. It was for “a ticket to a tourist destination on the other side of the country,” he said.

The trip was also pre-booked. “I was almost 6 months away from deployment. The transaction was processed a few weeks before,” the OP explained. He couldn’t think of any reason why his wife would book a single ticket to a tourist destination.

The furious OP told her she was going to call child protective services.

The next time he spoke to her via Skype, he casually mentioned the ticket.

Surprised, she asked him how he knew without knowing how online banking worked.

When the OP told her he got to her through the card’s transaction history, she said she went to “mental health” with her co-workers because she felt exhausted after taking care of the kids alone.

The man replied that he understood that she needed to rest, but felt that she should discuss this with him before buying a ticket for a trip that would leave their children without their parents.

He remembered:

“Then I asked her who was going to look after the kids for the week she was gone.

OP’s wife (Original Poster) replied that a 16-year-old neighbor would take care of the kids. Furious OP told her she was going to call child protective services for leaving the kids unattended in the house. So his wife agreed to call his mother and ask her to stay with the children while he was gone.

The day before the trip, OP called his wife, but her phone was unavailable. “I called my mother-in-law to check on the children and she told me that my wife had left early to spend the night at a hotel next to the airport,” he explained:

The OP found it odd that his wife was spending the night at a hotel near the airport. He waited for the hotel fee to appear in his bank transactions, but it never did.

He also waited for charges from his wife’s travel destination to appear in his transaction history but found nothing. The peculiarity of the journey became suspicious in him.

So, while his wife was away from home, the man started looking through her call records and discovered that she was in frequent contact with one number. She had been in contact with the same number for a very long time.

The man asked his wife to send him photos from the trip to clear his doubts.

She replied that she did not take any pictures. He then asked her to tell him the names of his associates.

He remembered:

“She gave me one name but didn’t tell me the last name or the department this woman supposedly worked in.

His wife’s answers made him look at her with growing suspicion. And so he confronted her with the number she had been in contact with all along. He asked her why she wasn’t in contact with the person on the way and then hung up abruptly.

Before the next phone call, the OP had already confirmed that there was no Temple co-worker on the way. He immediately confronted her and forced her to admit that she had gone on a “retreat” with a man.


“Eventually she admitted it was a male co-worker, but still claimed everyone else backed away from her.”

She also admitted to spending several nights with the same man in the same hotel room, and this infuriated the OP, who was tired of her lies and immediately demanded a divorce. He accused her of cheating and told her he didn’t want to live with her anymore.

In an attempt to stop him, the woman screamed and asked her children to hold the phone as she knelt down and begged him not to leave her. He ended the call and didn’t speak to her until he got home. He collected his clothes and uniforms because he decided to move.

The woman begged him not to leave him. She offered to stay in an open or s*xless marriage, but the OP refused. He said he would consider not divorcing her if she was honest about every detail.

She told him everything from the first time she met the man, but the OP knew she was lying. Before leaving the house, he asked her if she was still in contact with him, and according to the OP:

“She said she ‘could if I really wanted to'”

He said he wanted her to stop talking to him, so she agreed. Four days later, the man had to leave for New York with his children, but he did not. He stayed back while his wife thought they had left.

He tracked her phone on a search app and saw that she was at a restaurant.

After seeing that her phone was back at home, he went there to talk to her and saw something he would never forget.

He remembered:

“I waited for the hitchhiker to show her back home, waited a few minutes, and walked in on her and her partner in our bedroom.

The OP later found out that the man visited his house regularly and his children knew him very well. When OP was deployed overseas, they spent a lot of time together as a family.

After this incident, the OP got full custody of his kids while his wife begged him to take her back. He admitted that he tried to forgive her but couldn’t because she made his children the worst.

Most Redditors felt bad for the OP after reading his post. PaPaKAPture said things like this are typical for soldiers, writing:

“I’m sorry, but it sounds like you’ve come back from hell twice.

Thank you for your service.”

Meanwhile, sampa2nyc praised the OP for not falling for his wife’s flaming because what she did was wrong and could have endangered their children.

Other redditors blamed the OP and praised him for his mental strength.

Some also asked him how he got full custody of his children. The father explained that he chose not to reveal the ages of their children and, without giving too much away, said that the youngest is still in diapers and the oldest is old enough to realize that the mother is having an affair.

In addition, the man revealed that their eldest child did not have the best relationship with his mother. He admitted that his ex’s friends and family were shocked by the custody outcome, but also knew the mother wasn’t being completely honest about what was going on.

Dad also encountered skepticism from the person working on his case because she believed OP wanted full custody so he could have an advantage in the property settlement.

But after talking to everyone who knew his ex-wife, she finally gave the court permission to give him custody of the children.

A Reddit user gave another update. He said the children were fine and had minimal interaction with their mother.

However, he alerted his ex’s partner’s girlfriend and their parents but was careful not to endanger anyone at work.

Questions to ponder:

Do you think the OP should have grilled his wife more when he first saw the unusual transaction?

While talking to his wife, the OP casually mentioned the plane ticket she lied about. If he kept pushing, which he didn’t, there’s a chance he’d get some truth out of her and that could have ramifications for her trip.

If the wife was honest from the beginning, do you think there was a better chance of the OP forgiving her?

The OP gave his wife a chance to come clean, but she kept lying and he saw through it, reinforcing his decision to leave her. If OP’s wife was completely honest with him, maybe OP would consider giving her a second chance.


If you liked this story, you might like this one about a woman who was walking home at night when she was chased by unknown men. She saw a smiling stranger and asked him for help.

In the swirling storm of personal betrayal and family conflict revealed in this Reddit story, we witness the profound impact of a trust broken during a deployment. The story depicts a harrowing scenario of deception that ultimately unravels a family and underscores the emotional and logistical turmoil that can erupt from infidelity. As readers grapple with the harsh reality that the Original Poster (OP) is dealing with, they are left to ponder the delicate balance of trust, communication, and forgiveness in relationships.

The Reddit community’s responses highlight collective empathy and support for those navigating such treacherous personal circumstances, reflecting broader societal values ​​around marital fidelity and parental responsibility. This story serves not only as a cautionary tale of the consequences of deceptions*x but also as a testament to the tenacity required to confront and overcome such profound personal challenges. The resolution of the story, with the OP taking decisive action to protect her children and her own emotional well-being, might offer some comfort to those who find themselves in similarly heart-wrenching situations, emphasizing the importance of seeking the truth and keeping one’s principles to one’s face. adversity.

As this saga of trust, deception and the search for justice comes to an end, it leaves the lingering question of what paths were not taken and the possibilities of reconciliation if transparency and honesty had previously prevailed. It’s a powerful narrative that resonates deeply, reminding us of the fragility of relationships and the strength needed to rebuild life in its aftermath.

Leave a Comment