Before delving into the intricacies of Olivia’s father’s decision regarding his daughter’s wedding, it is essential to understand the context of the family dynamic and the significance of the dress in question. Olivia’s family, as described by her father on Reddit, appeared to be close-knit, with a tradition of supporting each other financially and emotionally during life’s milestones. Central to the dispute was Olivia’s decision to alter her mother’s beloved wedding dress for her own ceremony, a decision that deeply upset her parents, especially her mother.
The dress held immense sentimental value in the family as Olivia’s mother wore it on her wedding day and then passed it on to her daughters for their own weddings. However, Olivia’s decision to heavily alter her dress without her mother’s approval was met with shock and disappointment, leading to a rift in the family dynamic.
Soon-to-be bride Olivia had to visit a tailor for her final dress when she went with her father to pay the wedding suppliers. Her father glared at her and his eyes widened as she walked out of the dressing room. In times of need, family members are usually the only individuals who can help them. Even if things don’t always go according to plan, children realize that they can always rely on their parents and siblings in difficult situations.
Since her future husband was unable to cover the wedding expenses, the girl in today’s story begged her parents to foot the bill. Everything was going according to plan until the girl brought her father to the tailor to try on her wedding dress. But he had to cancel her wedding because he was so shocked to see her in her clothes.
Progenitor After seeing his daughter’s wedding dress at a tailor, Olivia’s father, Reddit user TRADressDistress, took to the social media platform. The events of that day were described under the AlTA sub.
The man gave some information about his family before diving right into the main story. He and his wife had three girls and one boy. The Redditor has given his children some kind of financial support to help with their education, pay for their wedding, or put down a down payment on a house.
Wedding dress The centerpiece of the father’s story was a wedding dress that his wife made in collaboration with her mother. She never gave the garment to anyone else because of its sentimental value, but she allowed her children to wear it to their weddings—as long as they changed the dress size—and nothing else.
The youngest daughter of the couple refused to wear it, but the eldest wore it to the wedding. Their daughter-in-law agreed to wear the dress to her reception in the meantime, and her husband photographed it so he wouldn’t feel left out. Olivia, their second daughter, decided to wear her mother’s dress and had it tailored when the time came for her to get married. Little did he know how surprised he would be when he saw his daughter in a moment.
Wedding-related errands Olivia asked her father to pay for her entire wedding because the Redditor was willing to provide financial support for his children.
A month before the wedding, she took him to the suppliers to make sure all payments were made. As they went to the tailor at the end of their journey, the man saw something. stated:
“Olivia was really nervous and I figured it was just the usual pre-wedding jitters and excitement. A man was waiting for her to emerge as Olivia went into the locker room for the final fitting. Little did he know how surprised he would be when he saw his daughter in a moment.
Surprise When she came out of the dressing room in her wedding dress, Olivia’s father looked at her in disbelief. He was unable to identify his wife’s clothing. He only noticed scraps of the dress his wife had worn at her wedding many years ago. He remembered:
“She took the straps, the sash, the train, and the embroidered skirt and had it added to this new dress.
It wasn’t supposed to work that way.
Although Olivia’s mother had sternly warned her not to make any major changes to her clothing, Olivia had good reason to break that rule.
Her justification
In a fit of rage, Olivia’s father ordered her to tell her mother what had happened when she returned home. He described the moment his wife found out what their daughter had done to her clothes:
“My wife was devastated.
Olivia claims she had the garment altered because she was the last child to wear it, and she figured it would be acceptable to remake it in a way that no one else would. She added that she asked the tailor to return the remnants of the original dress.
Family reaction
Olivia’s parents were not satisfied with this explanation.
In fact, her father declared that he would no longer cover her wedding expenses, and her mother decided not to attend the wedding. He was even going to cancel his payment at the tailor shop. He revealed:
“Our youngest daughter thinks I overdid it because she knew Olivia planned the wedding with our help and she can’t pay for everything without her.
Olivia’s in-laws, unable to cover the wedding expenses, asked the man to reconsider supporting his daughter’s wedding. They even recommended that Olivia’s parents stop communicating with her after her wedding.
Reader Notes
After reading what Olivia had done with her mother’s dress, Olivia’s father thought he should withdraw his offer to pay for her wedding expenses. That’s how he ended his message. When he asked if he should have paid Olivia the remaining wedding expenses, he received the following response from fellow Redditors:
“NTA. Thoughtlessly destroyed your wife’s priceless outfit.”
According to Redditor MD Thomas, Olivia’s actions towards her mother were disrespectful. If Olivia and her husband are unable to cover the remaining costs of the wedding, the user suggested that they shorten the celebration. Reddit member Alexemalexem agreed, stating that Olivia should have told her mother about her plans beforehand. Additionally, the user stated:
“It doesn’t matter that your daughter uses the dress last – it doesn’t give her the right to destroy/edit it.”
Olivia’s father was reassured by Reddit user LockWithoutAKey that he was not to blame, pointing out that his wife had previously stated that no one could change her clothes. A Reddit poster believed that Olivia changed the dress on purpose because she knew it would upset her mother.
Olivia’s in-laws were also wrong, according to another Redditor, when they suggested her parents stop talking to her after the wedding. Additionally, the user stated:
“It doesn’t feel the same, I know, but if you have all the pieces, a good seamstress can probably put it back together to make it look original.”
The father replied, “I got the original dress back, but not all the pieces.” He claimed he could have the clothes reconstructed by telling the seamstress about the missing pieces.
Do you think Olivia’s father made the right decision in refusing to support his daughter’s wedding? Do you think his choice was the right one? If you were in his place, how would you react?
Comment
byu/TRADressDistress from discussion
inAmItheAsshole
Comment
byu/TRADressDistress from discussion
inAmItheAsshole
Comment
byu/TRADressDistress from discussion
inAmItheAsshole
Comment
byu/TRADressDistress from discussion
inAmItheAsshole
Comment
byu/TRADressDistress from discussion
inAmItheAsshole
Comment
byu/TRADressDistress from discussion
inAmItheAsshole
Comment
byu/TRADressDistress from discussion
inAmItheAsshole
To read about another bride-to-be who made a dress for her wedding but was supposed to wear it to her fiance’s funeral, click this link.
In conclusion, Olivia’s father was faced with a difficult decision when he discovered that his daughter had significantly altered her mother’s beloved wedding dress without permission. Despite his initial willingness to financially support Olivia’s wedding, he eventually decided to rescind his offer due to the disrespect of his wife’s sentimental dress. The decision sparked debate among Reddit users, with many validating her father’s actions and condemning Olivia’s disregard for her mother’s wishes. Ultimately, the story serves as a reminder of how important it is to honor family traditions and sentimental belonging even in the midst of wedding preparations.